Topic: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

So, the next crapcan article I'm working on is all about the sometimes-questionable/sometimes-awesome world of track food.

So, show me what you've had: the good, the bad, and the ugly. I've only got a few experiences with tracks nearby, so I'd love to get some unique/awesome/horrifying/etc. things from outside of Texas on this one.

Also, if you have any advice on what to eat, what to avoid, etc. all weekend (no fart-fuel before stints? haha), post away.

(Will give credit for any pics/quotes, of course.)

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

I think this thread is done now.
http://i62.tinypic.com/34qmfmb.jpg
Good luck with the article

Apocalyptic Racing - Occupy Pit Lane racing
Racing the "Toylet" Toyota Celica powered by Chevrolet Ecotec.
24x Loser with the Celica. 16x loser in other fine machines
Overall winner Gingerman 2019

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

Farts keep the race seat warm on days like Sunday at ECR earlier this month.  Unsoaked beans work best for that.

2012 North Dallas Hooptie Judge's Choice Winners
If life gives you Lemons, install racing brakes!
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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

tSoG served up some awesome bacon at Barber. He brought it to the track uncut and sliced it into 3/8"-1/2" thick slices. I think my cholesterol doubled that day.

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

My first CMP race, my cousin and I bought a ton of supplies and brought a grill.  He came up with a track-side recipe: a Chicken tender with a piece of cheese on it wrapped in bacon and grilled.  We named it "Chicken CarDoneBlew Aheadgasket."  It was delicious.

Since then we figured out the vending and kindness of strangers was enough to subsist on, so we bring cash and lots of beer to trade.

Quad4 CRX - Wartburg 311 - Civic Wagovan - Parnelli Jones Galaxie - LS400 - Lancia MR2 - Boat - Sentra - 56 Ford Victoria
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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

I usually smoke a brisket on Friday nights before things get nuts. The first Road America race I also smoked a turkey breast. The rest of the weekend is the usual easy to cook stuff like burgers and brats but you always have to keep a supply of onions and peppers on the grill, cooked in bacon drippings of course.

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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

20 or so years ago we were towing from SoCal to NorCal  6 up in a dually to a sprint car race at Watsonville Speedway.  We stopped at the Pea Soup Andersons on I5 in Los Banos.  Everyone got the split pea soup.  I'm guessing that batch didn't get soaked.  That 90 min ride across the mountains was the worst torture I've ever had to sit through.  Then once we get there the water truck driver stuck it in the fence so the place was very dry and dusty.  Guy on the pole wrecks in turn one on the start.  No one can see so everyone piles in.  Not sure anyone drove away.  So the whole crew is thrashing away trying to get it fixed.  Meanwhile, the split peas are still working their magic.  It eventually got to the point where when the odor hit you all you could do was ask "Wow! Was that you or was that me?"

1990 RX7 "Mazdarita" 
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1964 Sunbeam Imp (IOE 2013 Sears Pointless)
1980 Rover SD1 (I Got Screwed 2014 Return of Lemonites) (Sold -> Houston.  Gone and forgotten)

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

Now are you talking about the stands at the track or what people make?

Racing 4 Nickels - 1989 Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera
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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

The Ridge may not have electricity or running water, but it does have food:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl … WF63c#t=66

1982 MG Metro 1300: IOE 2015 Pacific Northworst GP, Longest Distance 2010 Cd'L Box Wine Country Classic
1980 KV Mini 1: Worst of Show and Fright Pig Supremo 2009 Concours d'Lemons
1978 H Special: Second-Round Elimination 2010 Lemons Pinewood Derby at Sears Pointless
1967 SAAB 96: IOE 2012 Pacific Northworst GP

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

Oh, lordy, lordy... did I make a mistake.

Yeah, I'm a cheap bastard.  It may be part of why Lemons is so appealing to me.  But I take it to extremes.  Like when the wife tells me to throw out the moldy food from the back of the fridge -- I take it to work instead, scrape the mold off, and "Voila!" lunch is served!  At last December's Arsefreeze-a-palooza, my team was going to shack up in a motel while I was going to shack up in the back of my Prius.  This meant I had to fend for myself for food.  Looking through the cabinets, I found some semi-recently expired freeze-dried backpacker's food, and thought "well, we have to get rid of this sooner than later..."

Sleeping in the back of a Prius in near-freezing weather isn't exactly the most comfortable option for a 6'0" dude.  But I made it work.  To keep warm I layered up: long underwear, flannel pajamas, then an Israeli IDF extreme cold weather jumpsuit.  In this Michelin-man getup, I slithered into a flimsy Coleman sleeping bag and hunkered down for the night.  In my belly was a half-cooked bag of sweet-and-sour chicken and rice from Backpacker's Pantry.  It had required an unusual amount of chewing on various kernels of unknown substances, claimed to be "pineapples, carrots and onions".  What it lacked in taste, it gave back in fill factor.  I was stuffed like a fat chick in a cocktail dress at a San Jose nightclub.

I awoke at sometime around 3 AM with a stabbing pain in my gut.  My sleeping bag was wet from all the condensation -- it was too cold to crack a window earlier.  I tried to sit up but there's just no room in my little tin cocoon.  I rolled from side to side, trying to find a comfortable position, only to be answered by a wet, baritone gurgling.  The kind that usually precedes a gastro-intestinal explosion.  I knew the clock was ticking, so I began weighing my options...

shit my pants in the comfort of my sleeping bag, or

carefully extricate myself from the sleeping bag (which requires some yoga-like contortions in the back of a Prius), waddle several hundred yards to the bathrooms in the freezing cold, peel off my jumpsuit (no trapdoor in this guy) and sit on an ice sculpture shaped like a toilet.  I got goose bumps just thinking about it.

"Never gamble with a fart" is the age-old advice.  Though this was running through my head, I seemed to be leaning towards the "shit my pants" option.  It's just too damn cold outside.  Even in the Prius, I could see my breath.  I feared losing my dingus to frostbite.  I kept rolling around, doing some new-age interpretive "dance of the worm", trying to work this demon out of my belly.  Then came the moment of truth.  The gurgle.  The pucker.  Visions of a chocolate fondue fountain, no, a class IV rapid in Willy Wonka's river of chocolate.  I imagined having to clean out the Prius with a garden hose whilst wearing a hazmat suit.  ...and did the lord have mercy on me, but it was just a fart.

Like the 2011 Tōhoku earthquake, this fart was but a harbinger of the tsunami of hydrogen sulfide that was to overtake my poor little Prius.  Being wrapped in a sleeping bag and a jumpsuit, this meant the tsunami's only pathway to destruction was via my hood.  My nose was sitting in the front row, center, at the amphitheater of gastrointestinal distress, and my bowels would be playing a double-album.  The odor raced around my sinuses like a good dose of wasabi at an authentic sushi bar.  Even my eyes were stinging, watering, you'd swear I was just maced.  But the pressure-relief valve was doing his job, and oh, what a relief it was.

I was able to fall sleep a half-hour later, despite a failed attempt to aerate my miniature execution chamber.  The synthetic fibers that make up the Prius's interior seemed to be little hands that were quite adept at gripping grime, filth and odor.  Too bad it was too cold to ditch the IDF suit... I just had to keep my distance from everyone, lest they think (rightfully so) that I was walking around in a fully loaded diaper.  The drive home from Arsefreeze-a-palooza was windows-down, of course, and even that left it smelling of rotten eggs and dead babies.  Which reminds me, I still need to borrow my buddy's steam cleaner.  The missus still won't ride in my car.

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

We have one teammate who does cooking duty for everyone. He is also the Tech/Camera/Where-in-the-hell did we put that guy. Don't know how we would do without him. As for track food, gotta say Texas Motor Speedway (the big oval) has had the worst track food ever. Best? HMMM....probably gotta be Road America followed by Portland Intl.

Captain of the Speedholes Wrenching #365 1965 Rambler Marlin and owner of the "Cockroach 454 Chevy Bigblock". Collector Emeritus of awful crapcans.
Earned every finish with Blood, Sweat, Tears,  Smoked brakes,dead wheelbearings, two blower explosions, and a never-ending thirst for more fuel. Finished em all! Currently hiding in a secret base in the shadow of the "Race to the Clouds".

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

We do serious food for the weekend.

Hot breakfast every day, sandwiches, burgers, dogs or polishes for lunches with salads, cole slaw or potato salad, chips, snacks or candy bars/chocolate.
For dinner we always BBQ. Marinaded shrimp, ribs, rib eye steaks, chicken etc. Garlic bread, pasta, spaghetti and meatballs, roasted potatoes, corn on the cob.

Not all these items every race, but we mix it up

Always plenty of food and lots of left overs.

Variety of drinks: Coffee, water, gatorade, sodas and beer/wine or cocktails in the evenings.

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https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn2/t31.0-8/p180x540/1072314_573132586117402_299796047_o.jpg

TH 2009- 40th ~ SP 2010- 13th Class Bad win!! TH 2010- 17th ~TH 2010- 16th  SP 2011- 20th ~ RF 2011- 13th Least Horrible Yank Tank ~ TH 2011- 79th
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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

I think we do track food pretty damn well.  Some of it is personal preference, some of it was learning from Amanda (CrazyMike's girlfriend) of how to feed lots of people well, and some of it is just over the top fun.

At the first race, we had pretty basic stuff, but this past season we went so far as to roast a whole suckling pig at the track, and setup a put luck Thanksgiving dinner for 60+, and having "fryer night" at summit with a fried turkey and fried everything else we could find.

Some keys: Lots of prep ahead of time, freeze everything, and then use the crockpot as often as possible for lunches to keep everything warm for a few hours as people are available and need to eat. Everything is done on a big griddle and crock pots usually.  Here's a typical 3PM menu for the weekend:

Friday Breakfast: Pancakes from a homemade mix (fuck Bisquick!), Bacon, Spam, pork roll, bagels, juice, etc.
Friday Lunch: Pulled pork or chicken
Friday Dinner: Wartburgers.  These were made for our first race, when we had the Wartburg.  It's a burger, but with the awesome stuff mixed right in: Bacon, onions and mushrooms cooked in bacon fat, cheese, and my special blend of spices.  Everyone loves them, I usually bring a batch of 20 or so.

Saturday Breakfast: Cheesy scrambled eggs, cheesy hash browns, bagels, bacon, spam, pork roll, juice, etc.
Saturday Lunch: Chili or Beef stew
Saturday Dinner: one of the special dinners listed above usually (turkey, pig, etc), or maybe a chicken stir fry or spaghetti and meat sauce with sausage and whatnot (made in the crock pot)

Sunday Breakfast: Pancakes from a homemade mix (fuck Bisquick!), Bacon, Spam, pork roll, bagels, juice, etc.
Sunday Lunch: Jambalaya or meatball sandwiches
Sunday Dinner: Sandwiches of some sort, for the ride home or eat while packing up camp.

We keep 2 5 gallon cooler jugs at all times, one with water and one with gatorade. Everyone on the team gets their own Nalgene bottle to save on wasted cups/bottles.

We don't have a whole lot of pictures uploaded to a hosting site, but here's one of Thanksgiving at Halloween Hooptiefest 2013
https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn2/t1.0-9/s403x403/1379370_523524624400687_840685906_n.jpg

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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

Brett85p wrote:

I think this thread is done now.
http://i62.tinypic.com/34qmfmb.jpg
Good luck with the article

This. At the first Road America race, between the CarBQ team and Soggy, there was SAAB cooked BBQ ribs, salads, home-made kabasa, carrot cake, BBQ meatballs, pecan pie, cream cheese and sausage stuffed peppers, quiche, and 40 pounds of some of the world's best bacon, among other things. It was absolutely brilliant.

Fourteen time loser. You'd think I'd know better by now.

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

papal_smear wrote:

Oh, lordy, lordy... did I make a mistake.

Well, that was the funniest thing I've read in a long time so thank you for sharing and thanks for risking your Prius interior for our entertainment.

Quad4 CRX - Wartburg 311 - Civic Wagovan - Parnelli Jones Galaxie - LS400 - Lancia MR2 - Boat - Sentra - 56 Ford Victoria
Known Associate of 3pedal Mafia, Speedycop, and the Russians.  Maybe even NSF.

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

Say there, Sonic.  About how many do you think will eat the Easter breakfast? 

I'll be bringing about 6 dozen cookies, and I will be randomly distributing the extras since I'll be camping out by the  fueling/bathroom area.

Ex-USAF civilian, still a wench

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

I tend to screw up in the food department. Thursday mid-morning I start rounding up vehicles and trailers and start stuffing our crap into them. By around 6 PM we are headed for the track and by 9 or so are set up. Everyone except me leaves to find a hotel or a bed at home. Then I realize I have no food and no transportation. Just Gatorade and water. I haven't eaten since breakfast and the grill may or may not open in the morning. At least the guys will be bringing donuts in the morning.

Recently Keith, our latest fan-turned-crew, has been bringing McDonald's breakfast burritos in the morning and last weekend even brought croissant sandwiches, much classier than the track grill fair we had been living on. At night we'd usually head to a nearby town for dinner out of the weather, but for some inexplicable reason Alan' has a fondness for Denney's so at Buttonwillow that would be our evening. One the way back we'd get gas and the next morning's breakfast, usually an apple turnover, Oreo cookies, and iced tea, at a convenience store.

Food at the Ridge is another story. I rode up with Spank and raced with CrazyMike and packing light, just my driving gear and a sleeping bag, I again had no food. I don't remember how I managed that. Maybe pit mom Amanda packed food for us. She usually does. I do remember that the Speedchimp guys were cooking for everyone and dinner in their pits was most welcome, as was their hospitality and company.

At Thunderhill Casa Ramos (in town in Willows) is a favorite dinner stop. Good Mexican food, and by good I mean make sure you brought your Pepto. You'll need it. Over time I've found that the Seafood Mocajeta (spelling?) does the least damage. With anything else, even with Pepto, you will be paying for it until at least noon the next day.

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

Any track that team Pro-Crash-Duh-Nation is racing at. Always deeply gratefull for their fantastic Saturday Pasta Dinner.
http://i544.photobucket.com/albums/hh354/mzaite/IMG_0546_zps17fa405c.jpg

Or any of the other great and generous Paddock Party hosts that just make Lemons so fantastic!

Mistake By The Lake Racing (MBTL)
88 Thunderbird "THUNDERBIRDS ARE GO!"
A&D: 2014 Sebrings at Sebring (NSF), 2014 NJMP2 Jurassic Park (SpeedyCop), 2012 Summit Point J30 (PiNuts)
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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

Sonic wrote:

I think we do track food pretty damn well.

Hell yes.  Racing with 3PM guarantees a steady supply of damn good food.  And it makes it so much better / easier to race at your best if you're not wandering around scrounging up random track side food.

My best/worst track side food story was my first race with Misfit Toys Racing (parts of which now form 3PM), Summit Point 2010.  I brought my massive 4-burner gas grill/griddle and a ton of breakfast foods.  I then proceeded to drink far, far too much Friday night.  Saturday dawns and I'm first up.  I threw together a full hashbrowns/eggs/toast/bacon meal for 8 or so people, and then served myself.  One bite of the food and my hangover came on full force.  I couldn't touch it.  I spent the rest of the day bouncing between attempting to recuperate in the RV, hiding from the heat, and puking in the trash can outside.  That night I let my friend Frenchie shave my long hair off and I raced Sunday.  Ugh.

Quad4 CRX - Wartburg 311 - Civic Wagovan - Parnelli Jones Galaxie - LS400 - Lancia MR2 - Boat - Sentra - 56 Ford Victoria
Known Associate of 3pedal Mafia, Speedycop, and the Russians.  Maybe even NSF.

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

At one race we brought a camp stove. First night we cooked sockeye salmon, quinoa and green been casserole. For desert was a fresh apple crisp. In the morning we made beer-can muffins.

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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

What's the recipe for beer can muffins?

Ex-USAF civilian, still a wench

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

3PM, Fritz Dahlin, and Dave Morrow always have great food all weekend long.  We are truly blessed to be friends with all three.

Our team brings hot dogs for meat and anything else the guys bring to snack on.  My theory is hot dogs are already cooked, so the odds of getting sick because they are not cooked well enough is significantly lower than with hamburgers or chicken or most anything else.

As far as food made by the track I will recommend VIR's wraps.  They are 12" long, seem to weigh a pound or better, and you have enough choices that it takes a full 60 seconds just to place your order.  To top it off, they are only five dollars.  That was the best five dollars for track food I have spent since Silver Springs Speedway closed (God rest their french fries).

"She's a brick house" 57th out of 121 and 5th in Class C, There Goes the Neighborhood 2013
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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

USAF wench wrote:

What's the recipe for beer can muffins?

Second request.  Instructs and pics please?

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Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

dculberson wrote:
papal_smear wrote:

Oh, lordy, lordy... did I make a mistake.

Well, that was the funniest thing I've read in a long time so thank you for sharing and thanks for risking your Prius interior for our entertainment.

True that. You win the internets. I laughed my ass off, my wife kept asking me what was so funny.  "Fart joke, writ large" was the best summary I could come up with...

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Judges Choice and Regional Award winner! Chuckwalla '12, Buttonwillow '13, BFE GP '15, Miller '14 & '15, Sonoma '13,'14,'15,'17, '18. Inde '16,'17,'18. Other foolishness: Finisher of the inaugural Lemons Rally, in the black Jag.... and IOE in the Super Snipe back in '12.

Re: Tell Me About Your Track Food. (And/Or Track Farts.)

Precooked meatballs and a big bottle of BBQ sauce all in a baking tray on the grill on low makes for good easy tasty dinner that can simmer for hours.
I usually grab some cheap thick steak and put in a ziplock bag with whatever I can find for marinade and let that sit in the bottom of the cooler until Saturday night by then it's tender and tasty.
Chilli is good if you have a garage or RV for power.
Other staples are bananas cliff bars, cookies hotdogs and burgers.

Apocalyptic Racing - Occupy Pit Lane racing
Racing the "Toylet" Toyota Celica powered by Chevrolet Ecotec.
24x Loser with the Celica. 16x loser in other fine machines
Overall winner Gingerman 2019