1 (edited by Rich Duisberg 2017-07-07 06:47 AM)

Topic: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

Greetings, comrades!

Following the SHAMEFUL closure of the heart of British motoring excellence, namely, Rovers Longbridge works in Birmingham (England, not Alabama), by the capitalist pigdog Thatcher Government, we two hard-shirking Englishmen seek employment in the new world. Both card-carrying Union members, cast in the same mould as comrade Red Robbo, we can be relied upon to fulfil some, if not all, duties required in the pitlane and/or drivers seat of any British Leyland flavoured team that may be gracing Halloween Hooptifest this October. We can supply our own ale (because yours is piss), tools (liberated from Longbridge's toolroom), and BL spare parts needed (also liberated from Longbridge because, as Karl Marx said - all property is theft anyway) and over two decades experience in hitting an O series engine with a hammer inbetween the inevitable strikes.

Skills include; negotiation with management over pay and conditions, lighting of (and standing behind) braziers, placard waving, chanting of socialist slogans, wearing of brown coats, large hair and flat caps with a sullen expression, pelting Bobbies with brick ends, preparation of and drinking of endless cups of tepid tea, typing wild and increasingly unrealistic demands in triplicate to whoever, pilfering, distribution of communist propaganda, lock-outs, talking in a near-impenetrable but simultaneously clearly xenophobic Birmingham accent, oh, and repairing old British things to the same flawless standard as new. British only, sorry, we don't do G*rman because those buggers bombed our fish and chip shop.

The Amalgamated Union of Engineering Layabouts will pay for our travel and accommodation costs, we seek only gainful work with like-minded brethren in the pit-lane and/or drivers seat of a willing team at Hooptifest this October.

Yours in solidarity,

Duisberg, Richard.
Sleath, Darryl.

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

Pics of whitworth tools or this didn't happen.

--Rob Leone Schumacher Taxi Service
We won the IOE at Southern Discomfort.
We got screwed at The Real Hoopties of New Jersey  and we took cars down with us.
We got the curse at Capitol Offense but they wouldn't let us destroy the car.

3 (edited by Rich Duisberg 2017-07-09 12:27 PM)

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

RobL wrote:

Pics of whitworth tools or this didn't happen.

https://s3.amazonaws.com/tlf/tlf/forums/aws_uploads/post-4653-0-53883000-1383822003.jpg

See? True fact.

Having taken a democratic ballot, and raided the canteen cash register, we can probably also throw a small amount of 1970s Pounds Sterling at anyone with a suitable car. Genuine offer, drop me a line, and I'd appreciate it if you Lemons regulars could put the word out and/or point us in the direction of anyone who might be game.

Thanking you kindly,

Yours (etc)

Duisberg

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

We won't be at NH,  but I have an X-Type a Brit like you may enjoy racing.  All Lemons legal last raced at NJMP this year.  I'm considering selling it if you're interested.

Team Glue Sticks
00 Firebird, 02 X-Type, 93 NX2000, 00 Mazda 626 (Sold)
2016 NJMP Heroic Fix, 2017 NJMP Near Heroic Fix except we can't drive

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

That's capitalist pigdog Mrs. Thatcher to you, sir.

http://i3.birminghammail.co.uk/incoming/article2572338.ece/ALTERNATES/s615/PM196103.jpg

What is the Snell rating on that hair?

12X Loser - Delinquent Racing - '86 TRUMPACO Merkur - '17 Arse-Sweat, Sears Pointless, '16 Pointless, Vodden, Arse-Sweat, Button Turrible, Arse-Freeze - 2015 Vodden, Arse Freeze. '96 Ford Taurus SHO Skunk - '17 Vodden (Hope for the Future award - not me, the rookies), '15 Pointless, Button Turrible.

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

billybobster wrote:

That's capitalist pigdog Mrs. Thatcher to you, sir.

http://i3.birminghammail.co.uk/incoming/article2572338.ece/ALTERNATES/s615/PM196103.jpg

What is the Snell rating on that hair?

"The lips of Marilyn Monroe and the eyes of Caligula" to quote the President of France.

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

meyers0150 wrote:

We won't be at NH,  but I have an X-Type a Brit like you may enjoy racing.  All Lemons legal last raced at NJMP this year.  I'm considering selling it if you're interested.

This could be interesting. I shall send you an email now. Cheers.

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

And if it wasn't for her you'd all be speaking Spanish!

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

jimbbski wrote:

And if it wasn't for her you'd all be speaking Spanish!

¿Que?

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

Rich Duisberg wrote:
jimbbski wrote:

And if it wasn't for her you'd all be speaking Spanish!

¿Que?


Remember the Falklands!

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

jimbbski wrote:
Rich Duisberg wrote:
jimbbski wrote:

And if it wasn't for her you'd all be speaking Spanish!

¿Que?


Remember the Falklands!

[Insert midly racist TopGear type joke here]

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

I am surprised I missed this one....
We run a 1969 p6 rover in Lemons for the last few years.
I would like to have a talk about some future collaboration.
Sounds like we might have some in common.
Hit me up if you are interested.
Manny

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

Manny - thanks. I think I just emailed you. RSVP!

Cheers

14 (edited by Rich Duisberg Yesterday 04:02 AM)

Re: Longbridge Limeys looking for employment at Halloween Hooptifest

Still looking for a team, prepared to abandon any hope of driving something British and crap, happy to fly over and spanner/drive anything mildly interesting at NH.

Multiple LeMans winner Derek Bell once refused to even sit in my Morgan Three Wheeler and I wrote a book about the shite quality of British car factories. I like beer, own a hammer, speak 3 languages and am considered a passionate lover. Am I over qualified?