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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Judge Jonny wrote:
icemang17 wrote:

Okay there is 34 fuses accross the top...oddly enough the burned one #22 is supposed to be EMPTY...very odd.....out of the 34 slots we only really need 4......the others are all for junk that been removed

You removed the Super-Rad-A-Scope?

And the gram scale?

HEll no.....we need those..........the olliso-scope helps too.....that and the german dude named Horst we keep around too....since we need someone that can translate all the damm german words....

Richard Doty
1984 Porsche 928 "Estate"
Porsche- "there is A substitute" Racing
Dirt Poorsche Racing #2
  • From: Toronto, Ontario
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

I'll never curse my TR-8 again...

Jim "Endo" Anderton
30 years of racing and still not Brambilla.....
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

icemang17 wrote:
Judge Jonny wrote:
icemang17 wrote:

Okay there is 34 fuses accross the top...oddly enough the burned one #22 is supposed to be EMPTY...very odd.....out of the 34 slots we only really need 4......the others are all for junk that been removed

You removed the Super-Rad-A-Scope?

And the gram scale?

HEll no.....we need those..........the olliso-scope helps too.....that and the german dude named Horst we keep around too....since we need someone that can translate all the damm german words....

Good -- and can we assume the electro-babe magnitor is safe?

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"
  • Registered: 2009-10-25
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Judge Jonny wrote:
icemang17 wrote:
Judge Jonny wrote:

You removed the Super-Rad-A-Scope?

And the gram scale?

HEll no.....we need those..........the olliso-scope helps too.....that and the german dude named Horst we keep around too....since we need someone that can translate all the damm german words....

Good -- and can we assume the electro-babe magnitor is safe?

Yes and I'm trying really hard to get a Michelle Pheiffer look-alike on the team too...but I get "my little friend"

Richard Doty
1984 Porsche 928 "Estate"
Porsche- "there is A substitute" Racing
Dirt Poorsche Racing #2
  • Registered: 2009-10-27
  • Posts: 22

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

GnomeFabTech wrote:

He removed the automatic gold chain applicator and electric cologne spritzer.  I am not sure but that car may have had the optional device that bleaches the passenger's hair when it detects a brunette.

The problem with the car for Lemons ins the automatic wallet emptier that operates when you drive by a Porsche dealer, independent mechanic or tow truck company.
Has anyone in Lemons ever thought of bribing/tipping the tow drivers?
Our first race I felt like we made as many laps behind the tow truck as under power, and I know that we beat some people!

Fear the posing monkey!
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

mr2by4 wrote:
GnomeFabTech wrote:

He removed the automatic gold chain applicator and electric cologne spritzer.  I am not sure but that car may have had the optional device that bleaches the passenger's hair when it detects a brunette.

The problem with the car for Lemons ins the automatic wallet emptier that operates when you drive by a Porsche dealer, independent mechanic or tow truck company.
Has anyone in Lemons ever thought of bribing/tipping the tow drivers?
Our first race I felt like we made as many laps behind the tow truck as under power, and I know that we beat some people!

One of our pit crew asked the tow guys at MSR if he ever got tired of towing #71 off the track.  Apparently, the answered "no" with a huge sh!t eating grin.

And I totally need a hair bleacher.  Why can't a Neon have one of those?  Guess we must not be high class enough... Sheesh.

I'm the doctor who is a wife. Which makes the grease hard to explain to my patients... www.tetanusneon.com.

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57 Reply by GnomeFabTech (edited by GnomeFabTech 2009-10-29 07:51 AM)

  • From: Frogtown USA
  • Registered: 2009-05-01
  • Posts: 389

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bodVVtqmbZE

Cars, cameras, and easy living...
  • Registered: 2009-10-25
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

GnomeFabTech wrote:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bodVVtqmbZE

CLASSIC.....  "whose the U boat commander"

Richard Doty
1984 Porsche 928 "Estate"
Porsche- "there is A substitute" Racing
Dirt Poorsche Racing #2

59 Reply by Evil Genius (edited by Evil Genius 2009-10-30 11:54 AM)

  • From: Davis, Ca
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,843

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Our budget has be helped!         

    In removing the interior and cleaning out the car, we found $1.39 in change (rather disappointing for a Porsche) a 14k gold ring with some kind of stone in it and a SkyTel SkyPager .  No packets of white powder, though.       My wife's jeweler friend says that the gold in the ring is worth somewhere between $40 and $100, the stone is still unknown, it looks like a very flawed diamond, nearly worthless.   

   We are also launching all of the un-needed computers on ebay.  The lock computer, the cruise control computer, the central display computer and the bulb computer are all supposedly worth up to $100 each.       Damn, this Porsche racing thing is cheaper than I thought!  Unfortunately, the gold-chain detector and bimbo/valley girl talk translation computers are inop.

Gosh, my business card says 'Tech Tyrant'
  • Registered: 2009-10-25
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Here is an example of a USED computer we will be selling

http://www.mailordercentral.com/928intl … 20127%2000
http://www.mailordercentral.com/928intl … 20602%2004

Those two ALONE are $425.....even if we only get 1/2 that were down to a total value in the car of $37.50!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Richard Doty
1984 Porsche 928 "Estate"
Porsche- "there is A substitute" Racing
Dirt Poorsche Racing #2
  • Riktor
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Good luck brudda... might want to try and sell them to Porsche Dealerships or in Porsche groups... Just don't tell them why.

Sons of STIG
Judge Jonny, "So, what's the next formerly thought to be immune from winning that will steal the nickels?An MR2? A Fierro (ha ha ha)? A Datsun/Nissan Z? A Camaro?"
  • From: Frogtown USA
  • Registered: 2009-05-01
  • Posts: 389

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Evil Genius wrote:

The lock computer, the cruise control computer,

Um, it's a long race there boss.  You are gonna want that cruise control.

Cars, cameras, and easy living...

63 Reply by Evil Genius (edited by Evil Genius 2009-10-30 04:55 PM)

  • From: Davis, Ca
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,843

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

GnomeFabTech wrote:
Evil Genius wrote:

The lock computer, the cruise control computer,

Um, it's a long race there boss.  You are gonna want that cruise control.

Damn, you're right, do a line or two, set that puppy at 120 mph and just sit back, turn up the Van Halen and cruise to the win!

Gosh, my business card says 'Tech Tyrant'

64 Reply by KTL (edited by KTL 2009-10-31 11:18 AM)

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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Insiders tip (actually probably total urban legend) on 928's:  They're more aerodynamic goiing in reverse!  So as long as reverse works, you should be able to use that to your advantage...... wink

I bet those headlight motors are worth a good buck too.  The rear hatch glass is worth quite a buck, as it the uber cool rubber rear spoiler if its in good condition

BTW those cruise control units likely aren't $175.  The 928 shared those with the 911 since the inception of cruise control on the cars.  Dime a dozen at even a specialty dismantler like Parts Heaven or DC Automotive.

Nonetheless you've got some good resale parts.  If you can sell those manhole cover /dinner plate wheels, they're worth a fair buck- forged and made by Fuchs.  Sometimes they sell cheap too, so you could instead try to score a spare set.  They are strong, lightweight very durable wheels.  Also the "phone dial" wheels are ugly as shit and easy to come by

Kevin
  • From: Davis, Ca
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,843

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Well, some more progress:  We removed the springs and shocks, they come stock with threaded bodies and are somewhat adjustable.  Unfortunately, the adjusters were stuck from corrosion (aluminum collars on steel shocks) and it took about 4 hours to free them up. On one we had to split the collar with a cutoff wheel to break it loose, then we put the collar back on at the lowest setting and  TIG welded it back together.   With all the weight removed, the car still sat too high at the lowest setting. So back out with the shocks/springs, we hacked about 1.5 coils off and put it back together.   With the camber set at full negative all around the car has a mean stance...

Gosh, my business card says 'Tech Tyrant'
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

progress pictures, please!


KT

TH 2009- 40th ~ SP 2010- 13th Class Bad win!! TH 2010- 17th ~TH 2010- 16th  SP 2011- 20th ~ RF 2011- 13th Least Horrible Yank Tank ~ TH 2011- 79th
SP 2011- 105th ~ SP 2012- 119th ~ SP 2013- 139th ~ BW 2013- 17th
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

trekkor wrote:

progress pictures, please!


KT

Well since I can't figure out how to upload pics a video might work

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UU89TXddhX0

Richard Doty
1984 Porsche 928 "Estate"
Porsche- "there is A substitute" Racing
Dirt Poorsche Racing #2

68 Reply by ifb_mole (edited by ifb_mole 2009-11-01 11:36 PM)

  • Registered: 2009-09-01
  • Posts: 405

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

That car has to be a favorite already. V8 , under 2800 lbs, it must go like a scalded dog. We have a friggen Maxima, v6 , 3000 lbs, front wheel drive, there is no way we can run with a 928

  • Serj
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

damn, that has to be the best-sounding Lemons car evar. I can't wait to see all 12 of it's uber-sophisiticated and intoxicating laps before it blows...

70 Reply by Judge Phil (edited by MurileeMartin 2009-11-02 01:59 AM)

  • From: Land Of Subarus, Colorado
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 9,416

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

The 928's drivers will be very good, so you spectators will want to be watching as it racks up several really quick laps to start the race.

Their mechanics are also very good, but there won't be as much of a rush to watch them work- there'll be plenty of time to enjoy the spectacle of Absurdly Complicated Electrical Gremlin Hell, as in all weekend long. Did you know that Porsche recommends the use of a tunneling electron microscope to diagnose most 928 electrical problems, and that replacing any 928 relay must be done in a pure nitrogen atmosphere?

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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

MurileeMartin wrote:

The 928's drivers will be very good, so you spectators will want to be watching as it racks up several really quick laps to start the race.

Their mechanics are also very good, but there won't be as much of a rush to watch them work- there'll be plenty of time to enjoy the spectacle of Absurdly Complicated Electrical Gremlin Hell, as in all weekend long. Did you know that Porsche recommends the use of a tunneling electron microscope to diagnose most 928 electrical problems, and that replacing any 928 relay must be done in a pure nitrogen atmosphere?

I DO hope you're just completely full of...

Sons of STIG
Judge Jonny, "So, what's the next formerly thought to be immune from winning that will steal the nickels?An MR2? A Fierro (ha ha ha)? A Datsun/Nissan Z? A Camaro?"
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

All true.


KT

TH 2009- 40th ~ SP 2010- 13th Class Bad win!! TH 2010- 17th ~TH 2010- 16th  SP 2011- 20th ~ RF 2011- 13th Least Horrible Yank Tank ~ TH 2011- 79th
SP 2011- 105th ~ SP 2012- 119th ~ SP 2013- 139th ~ BW 2013- 17th
Follow Filthy on Facebook: Flailing Lizard Motorsports
  • Serj
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Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

once this thing dies it should replace the bobby bosch relay challenge for the really BAD track offenders.

"okay, you idiots got 4 black flags in the last 3 hours. this is your 5th. you can either put that pile of shit back on the trailer, or get this here 928 running again beefore you can return to the track. Which do you choose?"

"uhhhh....*whispers to teammate* We'll just put it back on the trailer, there's no way in hell we could get that thing running in a fortnight"

  • From: Davis, Ca
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,843

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

Final stripped weight  before cage started going in.... wait for it....   2570 lbs  about  55% front 45% rear, with about 4 gallons of gas (behind the rear axle)     Cage should weigh about 120 lbs, seat, harnesses, etc another 50ish.  So with driver and fuel we should be under 3000 lbs...   still heavy, but we do have Mr. Porsche's fine V8 and Mr Diamler's fine getribebox to haul our fat asses around...        Gotta love that 'one tire fire'   that was posted on the Video...wish we had a limited slip diff


     The suspension is STIFF,  with what we cut out of the springs the rate went way up....    The front has approx -2.5 degrees camber and we've still to adjust the rear, right now the right is +.5 and the left is - 1.2...       

           I will post some pics when I have time

Gosh, my business card says 'Tech Tyrant'
  • From: DF-Dubya
  • Registered: 2009-08-19
  • Posts: 820

Re: OK, so we bought this 928 for $250, and we're racing it

icemang17 wrote:

Well since I can't figure out how to upload pics a video might work

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UU89TXddhX0

Props on Sublime's "Wrong Way" playing in the background...

Summer's Eve Racing - '09 Yee-Haw; '10 Gator-O-Rama, NorDal Hooptie, Yee-Haw; '11 Gator-O-Rama, NorDal Hooptie (Winner, Class A!)
TARP Racing - '11 Yee-Haw, Heaps; '12 Gator-O-Rama (Winner, Class C ... Looking for a Class B Win to Complete the Trifecta!), Heaps; '13 NorDal Hooptie, Gator-O-Rama