1 Topic by Judge Jonny (edited by Judge Jonny 2009-09-28 10:18 AM)

  • From: Los Fucking Angeles
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,032

Topic: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

You know who you are and you know you're going to be needing to sidestep a whole mess of black flags.

Here's how.

Bring the Judges:

12 (or so) brake rotors. Drum brakes are OK, too.
100 feet or so of metal chain. The rustier the better
1 pair of Bolt cutters to cut said length of chain [EDIT: I guess it needs to be spelled out -- SOMETHING, ANYTHING that can cut chain will work -- DOES NOT have to be bolt cutters. Happy, you reprobates?]
1 Large boombox with batteries
Bicycles or other forms of Judicial transportation


Thanks!

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"
  • From: Brandywine, MD
  • Registered: 2009-07-15
  • Posts: 4,528

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

I'll bring the bolt cutters, I have a good one.

Captain: Speedycop & The Gang Of Outlaws -'94 Mark VIII (Least Horrible Yank Tank Stafford '09, NOLA '10) '61 Caddy (Org Choice-NL '09) '63 Tbird (EPIC Repair Failure-Gingerman '10, I Got Screwed-Summit Pt '10, I.O.E. WINNER Stafford '10!) '77 Lancia Scorpion (I.O.E. WINNER Joliet 2010!) '67 Galaxie 500 (Judges Choice-CMP '11)
Future Fleet: 1957 Ford Prefect 1942 Buick 1959 Bugeye Project GLCOAT

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  • wgl
  • Rookie Driver
  • Offline
  • Registered: 2009-05-22
  • Posts: 8

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

Are the bolt cutters part of the penalty "kit", or are they simply needed to cut lengths of chain ? Team Junk Player Special will have a rotary cutoff tool available. It'soften easier to cut chain with an abrasive wheel than with bolt cutters. Either way we'll do what we can to help your (our) cause.

  • From: Land Of Subarus, Colorado
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 9,416

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

We also need a couple of bicycles, golf carts, motorized Barcaloungers, etc.

Murilee Martin aka Judge Phil on Facebook
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5 Reply by Speedycop (edited by Speedycop 2009-09-28 10:02 AM)

  • From: Brandywine, MD
  • Registered: 2009-07-15
  • Posts: 4,528

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

We'll bring the bikes again as well. You want THE hat?

Captain: Speedycop & The Gang Of Outlaws -'94 Mark VIII (Least Horrible Yank Tank Stafford '09, NOLA '10) '61 Caddy (Org Choice-NL '09) '63 Tbird (EPIC Repair Failure-Gingerman '10, I Got Screwed-Summit Pt '10, I.O.E. WINNER Stafford '10!) '77 Lancia Scorpion (I.O.E. WINNER Joliet 2010!) '67 Galaxie 500 (Judges Choice-CMP '11)
Future Fleet: 1957 Ford Prefect 1942 Buick 1959 Bugeye Project GLCOAT

Speedycop's Website

  • From: Land Of Subarus, Colorado
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 9,416

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

And a loud boombox, with batteries.

Murilee Martin aka Judge Phil on Facebook
Murilee Martin on Twitter
Judge Phil's Lemons posts on Car and Driver
MurileeMartin.com

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  • From: Los Fucking Angeles
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,032

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

wgl wrote:

Are the bolt cutters part of the penalty "kit", or are they simply needed to cut lengths of chain ? Team Junk Player Special will have a rotary cutoff tool available. It'soften easier to cut chain with an abrasive wheel than with bolt cutters. Either way we'll do what we can to help your (our) cause.

Good point -- Abrasive wheel/rotary torch/whofuckingcares is fine as long as it cuts the chain.

the important parts then are the chain and the brake rotors.

Just bringing bolt cutters without the important parts will not help your campaign.

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"
  • Registered: 2009-09-17
  • Posts: 29

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

I feel a ball & chain penalty is coming right along.

  • From: Los Fucking Angeles
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,032

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

killerken53 wrote:

I feel a ball & chain penalty is coming right along.

Wrong

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"
  • From: Safety Harbor, FL (Tampa)
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 668

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

How to add a weight penalty to a car safely, yet allow said weight to rattle around in the car adding noise and unpredictability?  Hmmm....

Lemons South 2008 - Fail, Lemons South Spring 2009 - Fail, Lemons Detroit(ish) 2008 - Fail, Lemons South Fall 2009 - Fail, Lamest Day 2009 - Fail, Miami 2010 (Chump) - 2nd!, Sebring 2010 (Chump) - Fail, Cuba 2010 - Crew Chief, Roebling 2011 (Chump) - 8th!, Sebring 2011(Chump) - 19th!
  • From: Automation Alley
  • Registered: 2009-07-14
  • Posts: 206

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

DCS has brake rotors. We also have a cut-off wheel and an angle grinder. And a purple girl's (we mean girl's, not ladies) bicycle.

Captainess: #88 Scirocket Racing - Did someone say Pikachu?

atomicalex's Website

  • From: Craphole, NJ
  • Registered: 2009-05-01
  • Posts: 517

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

Chain a few rotors around the neck of the driver and push him or her head first into the nearest porta john?

http://www.ducttapemotorsports.com/
http://www.teamdfl.com
"I can see it now, a pile of nickels and all the glory of being a real race car driver."
Prepping the Red wReck for the 24 Hours of Lemons

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  • From: Los Fucking Angeles
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,032

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

Loren wrote:

How to add a weight penalty to a car safely, yet allow said weight to rattle around in the car adding noise and unpredictability?  Hmmm....

No

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"
  • From: Los Fucking Angeles
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,032

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

TeamDFL wrote:

Chain a few rotors around the neck of the driver and push him or her head first into the nearest porta john?

Kinda but not really

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"
  • From: Automation Alley
  • Registered: 2009-07-14
  • Posts: 206

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

A new version of the hammer throw?

Oh yeah, it's Hammer time!

Captainess: #88 Scirocket Racing - Did someone say Pikachu?

atomicalex's Website

  • From: Los Fucking Angeles
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,032

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

All of you -- stop guessing

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"
  • From: Bloomington, IN
  • Registered: 2009-08-14
  • Posts: 1,525

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

atomicalex wrote:

A new version of the hammer throw?

Oh yeah, it's Hammer time!

Now I have that stuck in my head.  Thanks.  Time to go find the pants now.

Bloomington, IN
We'll bring Beer!  Motorsports
Team Fiery Death! #0 2009 Lamest Day(65th), 2010 American Irony(24th), 2010 Detroit Bull(4th),2012 Capitol Offense (8th) 2012 American Irony (11 th), 2013 Capitol Offense (3rd) 2013 Chubba Chedder (4th, Judge Choice!) Now sadly part of a scrap pile. 
Toothless Racing Deadbeats #110 2011 Summit Point (61st) Currently being rebuilt into the new car!
  • From: Cedar Rapids, IA
  • Registered: 2009-05-01
  • Posts: 89

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

I believe it has something to do with the boombox.

Public Enemy Karoke..  So who's Chuck D if the offending driver is Flava Flav?

I want a brake rotor flava flav necklace when this is over.  smile

-Chip

Free Candy Racing
www.freecandyracing.com

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  • From: Automation Alley
  • Registered: 2009-07-14
  • Posts: 206

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

^^ Winner winner chicken dinner!!!!

Captainess: #88 Scirocket Racing - Did someone say Pikachu?

atomicalex's Website

  • From: Los Fucking Angeles
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 1,032

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

Still wrong.

Funny, but wrong

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"

21 Reply by TeamDFL (edited by TeamDFL 2009-09-28 04:45 PM)

  • From: Craphole, NJ
  • Registered: 2009-05-01
  • Posts: 517

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

NDGeist wrote:

I believe it has something to do with the boombox.

Public Enemy Karoke..  So who's Chuck D if the offending driver is Flava Flav?

I want a brake rotor flava flav necklace when this is over.  smile

Nice.  Since the powers-that-be aren't doing this, this is now a valid theme.  If you don't want it, can I use it next year?  Fight the power.  What flavor of malaise era luxobarge is appropriate, an OldsmoBuick?

http://www.ducttapemotorsports.com/
http://www.teamdfl.com
"I can see it now, a pile of nickels and all the glory of being a real race car driver."
Prepping the Red wReck for the 24 Hours of Lemons

TeamDFL's Website

  • Stevo
  • Ripened Lemon
  • Offline
  • From: Indianapolis
  • Registered: 2009-05-26
  • Posts: 102

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

Too easy.
My 98 (You Gonna Get Yours)

  • From: Warren, OH
  • Registered: 2009-08-28
  • Posts: 105

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

MurileeMartin wrote:

And a loud boombox, with batteries.

Remind me when you get to the track and I'll score  you a boombox. Remember....Junk Player Special....hint, hint. Oh, and we have a boatlaod of brake rotors behind our shop.

Bryan Bartzi
Nelson Ledges Roadcourse
  • From: Land Of Subarus, Colorado
  • Registered: 2009-04-30
  • Posts: 9,416

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

We will also accept a car stereo/speakers screwed to a piece of plywood and powered by an old Die Hard, if you don't have a boombox.

Murilee Martin aka Judge Phil on Facebook
Murilee Martin on Twitter
Judge Phil's Lemons posts on Car and Driver
MurileeMartin.com

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  • From: Warren, OH
  • Registered: 2009-08-28
  • Posts: 105

Re: Want to get out of jail free at Nelson Ledges?

MurileeMartin wrote:

We will also accept a car stereo/speakers screwed to a piece of plywood and powered by an old Die Hard, if you don't have a boombox.

I bet we could do that too!!!

Bryan Bartzi
Nelson Ledges Roadcourse