Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

Allow me to break character here for a second -- Judge Phil and I give away almost all the booze to the corner workers and our colleagues in the yellow shirts.

We get to have fun and punish all you cheaters with no business being on a race track -- i.e. we have fun.

They actually have to work.

But we typically take one or two bottles of the good stuff each. And ALL the cash. In case you were wondering.

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

What percentage skip the bribe altogether?


KT

TH 2009- 40th ~ SP 2010- 13th Class Bad win!! TH 2010- 17th ~TH 2010- 16th  SP 2011- 20th ~ RF 2011- 13th Least Horrible Yank Tank ~ TH 2011- 79th
SP 2011- 105th ~ SP 2012- 119th ~ SP 2013- 139th ~ BW 2013- 17th
Follow Filthy on Facebook: Flailing Lizard Motorsports

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

Cash.... Hmmm... I don't think my team of SubaBoob drivers can compete with the Neapolitan Ice Cream Doctors.....   YUP!!  New idea.  Tennessee Moonshine!

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

trekkor wrote:

What percentage skip the bribe altogether?


KT

The dumb percentage

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"

30 (edited by BoB 2009-09-18 07:45 AM)

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

Judge Jonny wrote:
trekkor wrote:

What percentage skip the bribe altogether?


KT

The dumb percentage

Are these also the ones who whine during the bs inspection.

Racing 4 Nickels - 1989 Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera
2011 SHOWROOM-SCHLOCK SHOOTOUT  IOE Winner
2012 The Chubba Cheddar Enduro Class C winner
Facebook Page

31 (edited by cpmskinny 2009-09-18 09:01 AM)

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

We chose to bribe with some good old homemade moonshine in both Amaretto and Apple Pie flavors.  I thought that they would be a shoe in for the moonshine award, but then they didn't do that like they did in the spring.  What gives judges?  Why was this award not a part of the fall show?  I was seriously hoping that if the Lab Rats weren't going to be remembered for any of our on track performance, maybe we could be immoralized by receiving the moonshine award.

"Sharp as Bear Claws and Slicker Than Goose Shit"
Lab Rats Motorsports
1990 VW Jetta
Charlotte, NC

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

What do you say we all chip in and get the judges two hookers for the Lamest Day weekend?

Maybe they'll be too distracted to pay us much mind.

Spud

Remember, it's never too early to start embellishing the past.

"so there I was, 90mph, sideways on the brink of death ..."

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

cpmskinny wrote:

We chose to bribe with some good old homemade moonshine in both Amaretto and Apple Pie flavors.  I thought that they would be a shoe in for the moonshine award, but then they didn't do that like they did in the spring.  What gives judges?  Why was this award not a part of the fall show?  I was seriously hoping that if the Lab Rats weren't going to be remembered for any of our on track performance, maybe we could be immoralized by receiving the moonshine award.

Condensed in a truck radiator? I get it....blind the judges and they can't see the cheater parts!

Jim "Endo" Anderton
30 years of racing and still not Brambilla.....

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

cpmskinny,

The Amaretto moonshine was awesome.

Our Lady of Perpetual Downforce
http://www.perpetualdownforce.com/

35 (edited by cpmskinny 2009-09-18 10:20 AM)

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

jimeditorial wrote:
cpmskinny wrote:

We chose to bribe with some good old homemade moonshine in both Amaretto and Apple Pie flavors.  I thought that they would be a shoe in for the moonshine award, but then they didn't do that like they did in the spring.  What gives judges?  Why was this award not a part of the fall show?  I was seriously hoping that if the Lab Rats weren't going to be remembered for any of our on track performance, maybe we could be immoralized by receiving the moonshine award.

Condensed in a truck radiator? I get it....blind the judges and they can't see the cheater parts!

Don't give away all of my secrets.  Mine only causes slight blindness in just one eye.   Small price to pay for such a fine treat.  Couldn't you tell from the Lab Rats driving all weekend?  You wouldn't think that we are cheating in a Colt, would you?

"Sharp as Bear Claws and Slicker Than Goose Shit"
Lab Rats Motorsports
1990 VW Jetta
Charlotte, NC

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

st_rage wrote:

cpmskinny,

The Amaretto moonshine was awesome.

Thank you very much.  Everyone that is introduced seems to love that stuff.

"Sharp as Bear Claws and Slicker Than Goose Shit"
Lab Rats Motorsports
1990 VW Jetta
Charlotte, NC

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

Spud wrote:

What do you say we all chip in and get the judges two hookers for the Lamest Day weekend?

Maybe they'll be too distracted to pay us much mind.

Spud

You do realize that it is Ohio and would be cruel to subject them to that kind of punishment.

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

I've heard great things about the local Amish hookers.

Signed,

Uh, not Spud .  (Did I really say that out loud?)

Remember, it's never too early to start embellishing the past.

"so there I was, 90mph, sideways on the brink of death ..."

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

st_rage wrote:

cpmskinny,

The Amaretto moonshine was awesome.

Indeed. It was really, really grand.

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

We could send them to the topless Amish bar....

Bryan Bartzi
Nelson Ledges Roadcourse

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

Bryan KF8G wrote:

We could send them to the topless Amish bar....

*shudders at the thought of all natural dancers*

Captain: Speedycop & The Gang Of Outlaws -'94 Mark VIII (Least Horrible Yank Tank Stafford '09, NOLA '10) '61 Caddy (Org Choice-NL '09) '63 Tbird (EPIC Repair Failure-Gingerman '10, I Got Screwed-Summit Pt '10, I.O.E. WINNER Stafford '10!) '77 Lancia Scorpion (I.O.E. WINNER Joliet 2010!) '67 Galaxie 500 (Judges Choice-CMP '11)
Future Fleet: 1957 Ford Prefect 1942 Buick 1959 Bugeye Project GLCOAT

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

Judge Jonny wrote:

Allow me to break character here for a second -- Judge Phil and I give away almost all the booze to the corner workers and our colleagues in the yellow shirts.

OMG!!! To the corner workers??? I just noticed this. See at Nelson, we have a drinking team with a flagging problem... You're gonna have some really hung over flaggers if you do this. That's why I prefer to leave my RX-7 very loud. To torture those that are "under the weather." But if you give to the yellow shirts, some of our minions are underage. I myself prefer Jameson...

Bryan Bartzi
Nelson Ledges Roadcourse

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

DCS has this really awesome limoncello to hand around...... It won't put you under the table, but it will help you understand why FIATs are completely acceptable in Italy. You might even start to appreciate opera. wink

Captainess: #88 Scirocket Racing - Did someone say Pikachu?

44 (edited by scrowner 2009-09-29 11:01 AM)

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

trekkor wrote:

What percentage skip the bribe altogether?


KT

With a bit of a risk exposing my team to future BS issues, we did not bride, and we had an E30, and we only got 1 penalty lap.

'86 E30, '09 Stafford Aug, '10 CMP Feb, VIR Apr, Summit Jun,  CMP Sep
             '11 CMP Feb, Rock Mar, Charlotte Apr, Summit Jun
'68 MGB '11 NJMP Apr (winner IOE)

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

scrowner wrote:

With a bit of a risk exposing my team to future BS issues, we did not bride, and we had an E30, and we only got 1 penalty lap.

Quit bragging. tongue

Captainess: #88 Scirocket Racing - Did someone say Pikachu?

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

BossTweed wrote:
Judge Jonny wrote:

Casked in 1992

Please identify yourself. You made the night of four VERY tired motherfuckers out here in Frankfurt

I remember some E30 team bitching about how they bribed you guys with awesome scotch and still got a 40 lap penalty (they had the guy at the liquor store pick it out).

That was the BimmerForums.com com team I think. 

-Scott

Scott Barton

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

Judge Jonny wrote:

Casked in 1992

Please identify yourself. You made the night of four VERY tired motherfuckers out here in Frankfurt

That was us, Team Bimmerforums.com

Glad you guys enjoyed it! See you in the spring.

-kish

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

BossTweed wrote:
Judge Jonny wrote:

Casked in 1992

Please identify yourself. You made the night of four VERY tired motherfuckers out here in Frankfurt

I remember some E30 team bitching about how they bribed you guys with awesome scotch and still got a 40 lap penalty (they had the guy at the liquor store pick it out).

crap, we never whined and always took all of our penalties in good humour smile we were there to have fun and we had a ton of fun. definitely will be back in the spring. we didn't have anyone in a liquor store pick it, that's from my personal collection of fine single malt.

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

kishg wrote:
BossTweed wrote:
Judge Jonny wrote:

Casked in 1992

Please identify yourself. You made the night of four VERY tired motherfuckers out here in Frankfurt

I remember some E30 team bitching about how they bribed you guys with awesome scotch and still got a 40 lap penalty (they had the guy at the liquor store pick it out).

crap, we never whined and always took all of our penalties in good humour smile we were there to have fun and we had a ton of fun. definitely will be back in the spring. we didn't have anyone in a liquor store pick it, that's from my personal collection of fine single malt.

You know... what you should have done is every time you came in for a black flag, sought me out and said, "we gave you the Highland Park."

Lemons justice is anything but.

"This is the scene where I get shot," Bronson said. "I have these little squibs that explode to make it look like bullets are hitting." "Fascinating," said Bergman. "I never knew how they did that." "You mean," asked Bronson, "you don't use machine guns in your movies?"

Re: Best Bribe Ever: 1992 Signatory Vintage Highland Park

Judge Jonny wrote:
kishg wrote:
BossTweed wrote:

I remember some E30 team bitching about how they bribed you guys with awesome scotch and still got a 40 lap penalty (they had the guy at the liquor store pick it out).

crap, we never whined and always took all of our penalties in good humour smile we were there to have fun and we had a ton of fun. definitely will be back in the spring. we didn't have anyone in a liquor store pick it, that's from my personal collection of fine single malt.

You know... what you should have done is every time you came in for a black flag, sought me out and said, "we gave you the Highland Park."

Lemons justice is anything but.

we'll remember for next time wink